[Un]Common Stupidity

    So it has come down to it at last. The final nail in the coffin. The ending waltz on the dance floor. The last Pringle in the can. Or something. Either way, we have sworn in another president, we have upheld our particularly American brand of Democracy, and we are all certainly awaiting every politician to be taken into custody, executed, and then for Trump to rule forever. Q just has to be correct right? The track record is.... stunning? Pictured: Q at his computer, or something. Creator: Rembrandt  |  Credit: Hermitage     Either way, our country has reached the dawning of a new administration. An event that has happened 45 previous times, and will undoubtedly happen many many more. But along the way, there was a bit of... discourse, if you could call it that. Most of it was spurned on by the greatest of all threats in this day and age, the Keyboard Warriors. Yes, this multi-class, 12th level, 5h Edition DnD champion has, for the last 5-6 ye...

I would first like to thank everyone for reading my recent post about my father. It meant a lot to me that so many would be moved by my thoughts and words about someone who meant so much in my life. Now though, my thoughts are clearer, my sadness has receded somewhat, and I am ready to come back into the world. Lets see what I missed... (All Rights held by The New York Times) Oh for f^@&s sake... Abortion has been a hot bed topic in America for a vast number of years. Ever since crusty old politicians realized that they could extend their grimy fingers into the lives of others, some have tried to use this power to push their own religious and personal beliefs. And while some people (ed note: Smart people) would say that a politicians place is to enforce and enact the will of the people they represent, others will chime in and say this is how it's always been done. And so, I welcome back my guest from my first post ever, Abraham Lincoln , to offer us a sage quote ...

.... And in summation, that's how you fix all of our political and humanitarian issues. Thank you for reading for the past 2 months. This series has been a big one. Twelve blog posts. Just amazing what steady viewership and dedication will brin- .... (ed note: What do you mean they haven't been posting? What do you mean they haven't even been SAVING?! YOU MEAN I HAVEN'T BEEN ACTIVE HERE FOR 2 MONTHS?!?! MOTHE@$@^&@^@*()$)*(!^(97278^&!*(@!!!!) Well... this is awkward. It seems that my creative juices needed a pick me up. Yeah. That's what I'll go with. Lets get onto the post. It's about one of my favorite topics: sadness and misery in the world! Yaaaay! ... I need a drink.... 52 Shirley Temples later. So for those who have been living under a rock, or at least have the better sense to not listen to ANY news nowadays, a several thousand people strong caravan of refugees and immigrants has slowly been making its way across Central American ...

Today I want to talk about a certain group of people. These people, they are just the worst. They don't care about what happens to the others groups around them. They always try to impose their ways unto others. They dress weird, act weird and have such strange "fun" activities and past-times. I really can't see how anyone can stand them at all. And their food is so disgusting! And the worst part of it all? They always move into a neighborhood and it change it to suit their needs. I mean, I used to know this great place, and it got changed completely to suit the new demographics. I just can't stand them. What? I haven't mentioned who it is I'm talking about? Well, its obvious isn't it? Why? Who're YOU thinking about? Damn illegals. Racism, like stupidity, knows no color. Any group of people can be racist against another. That's a simple fact. And it's further illustrated by our thoughts. Such as this; who exactly did you think...

OH EM GEE! Millennials are like, sooooo entitled! They want everything handed to them on a platter! They never wanna work, they are soooooo lazy! It's really no wonder they aren't getting anywhere in the world. I mean, please, you expect to work 50 hours a week and still be able to eat after paying bills? Whatever. So much entitlement you'd swear Vince McMahon owned shares in it. I just can't believe these idiots! I'm so glad I'm not a millennial! Not me! Just a good ol' fashioned 90's kid. Nothing wrong with us whatsoever! (ed note: God it hurt to talk like that. So yeah. Millennials. Your welcome.) Damn young people. Well, I'm back from having that nervous breakdown up there, lets get into some serious discussion now shall we? There have been a bit of hatred and intolerance lately regarding a certain group of people. Am I talking about LGBTQ people? No. No I am not. African-Americans? No. Hispanics? No. Not them. Native Americans? Demo...

Babies. Those cute little roly pollies of meat and drool; everyone loves them! People love them, dogs love them, bears love them... but no one loves them more than HEARTLESS CORPORATION NUMBER 87 ! Nope, not one person, animal or thing can possibly love those little future money spending humans more! This is why they are so invested in their health and well-being! Surely no money- er, good can come from letting these poor helpless creatures suffer right? This is why these heroic corporations must band together and stop one of the most dangerous threats to baby-kind the world has ever seen. They must stop the horror... known as breast feeding.... yeah its gonna be that blog post today. (ed note: Boobies.) This spring in Geneva, Switzerland, the WHO (World Health Organization) met with over a hundred delegates from various nations around the world. Their goal was to sign a worldwide resolution about the importance of promoting breast feeding as the healthiest way of feeding a grow...

Anyone who knows me well knows of a quote that I always refer back to: "Quotation marks make things sound more important than they really are. Especially fake things."  -Abraham Lincoln (impersonator) 2009 These words, which I have definitely said many times in my life (ed note: wink wink) have given me many things to think on. Many things that have become more and more relevant as our world spins round in this year of 2018. For instance, the above quote, (which is, like, totes real guys), is so blatantly fake that even the Nigerian Princes are shaking their heads in disbelief. But these days, one can't be so sure about what you read. Or hear. Or watch. OR EXPERIENCE!! You see, in an era where buzzwords like "fake news" and "alternative facts" and "oh god what the hell now" are becoming more and more commonplace, we have started to develop an innate bullshit sensor that helps us to cut through the crap and figure out what's rea...